Learning to Make Adjustments After Death of Spouse in July 2018

Hello everyone. I've never written a blog before so am not sure how this works but as I lost my husband in July 2018 so it's been challenging trying to make the necessary adjustments that need to be made (I'm trying but it will take time). My husband and I always watched the Hallmark Movies and Hallmark Movies and Mystery channels, the only two Hallmark Channels I can get. I want to thank three particular actresses and all of their Hallmark movies for helping me through this difficult time and they are Lacey Chabert, Kelli Martin, and Danica McKellar. How I'd love to meet them in person sometime but I also know that it's wishful thinking on my part and there's an extremely slim chance of this ever happening but one can always dream, though, can't they? Of course they can. I look forward to all of their new movies (even ones they haven't made yet, too). Another thought, it would be neat to see all three of them in the same movie at the same time. Oh well. It's just an idea.  I know celebrities visit many countries but I always wonder if any of them have ever gone to or made a movie in the country of Wales in the United Kingdom. That's where my ancestors came from on my mother's side.
Well, seeing as how it's headed on for 8:00 a.m. and I haven't had breakfast yet, I'm going to go get some breakfast and I want to give Lacey, Kellie, and Danica a huge Thank You for their movies helping me with making and learning how to make the necessary adjustments I need to make at this time in my life.

Saturday, June 1, 2019
To my "Little Buddy Boy" (my husband, may he RIP). Sure is hard to believe that you've been gone almost eleven month already and you are most certainly missed. How I'd love to be able to watch movies and talk with you again. I know that I have some big changes to make in my life, but where to start? Questions I have are: Do I want to stay here or move into the town(suburb) that we talked about or stay here where I'm at? Of course the issue being the usual moolah factor as I just don't have it or I would in a minute. How much longer to I want to work? Will I ever be able to retire comfortably? You know my opinion about women working and I've never changed it after all these years. 
I  see where some people have made lists of things they want to do such as 30 things in 30 days for their birthday. Would it be feasible to do the same thing only with 70 things in 70 days? Not sure but perhaps it could be drawn out to so many things per week for the year? I'll have to think about that. Some of the things that I want or would like to do and yes, some of them would/will probably take me out of my Comfort Zone. Can I even come up with seventy(70)? Here is what I have so far:

1. Sing a solo at church
2. Act or at least audition for a Play (when I was younger, a friend would always tell me she wanted to go watch the auditions for a certain play and when we got there I oftentimes found myself becoming a part of the chorus in a musical or stage manager of some play. I really enjoyed it, but when my friend got married and moved, I stopped going. I wonder if I have enough gumption to even try this on my own anymore). These were Community Plays that the Community Theatre put on although two of them were when I was in College and was in the Choir and we did not have a choice as we were expected to be in the chorus.
3. Go to Wales and see a Welsh Eisteddfod.
4. Meet Lacey Chabert, Kellie Martin, Danica McKellar and Marlee Matlin and watch them work as well as become friends with them. It would be nice to see all four of them in the same movie... I know this is wishful thinking and that it probably would/will never come true, but one can wish and dream. If I were an actor, I'd love to be in one of their movies and act alongside of them.
5. Questions I would like to ask the above actresses: *How many states have you been to? *What states have you NOT BEEN to? * What are some of the hobbies you have in real life? * In all of the genres of movies that you have made, which genre is your favorite? *Is there a genre that you haven't done that you would like to do? *What are the ways that make you cry when making a movie? *Do you find it easy or hard to make the sad scenes? *
6. Have friends that would say "YES" occasionally when I ask them to do things with me. Growing up, when I would ask I would get such answers as "No, I don't want to do anything with you" or if they said yes, then they'd change their minds at the extreme last minute and say they had changed their minds.  Due to this, I'm extremely hesitant to ask people to do things so oftentimes, even if it's something I want to do, but know I won't feel comfortable going alone, I just don't go and then regret it later. Don't get me wrong, I do a very few things on my own, but not very many or very often. Without my "Little Buddy Boy" (we always did things together) I feel lost and alone much of the time.